Supporting teens through family and relationship difficulties
Family breakdowns are difficult, particularly when children or teenagers are caught in the midst. Teens are on the cusp of adulthood, seeking independence while still relying on a stable, familiar base. The separation of parents can leave teens feeling like the foundation has crumbled, and that everything they once knew is altered. Providing them with stability and reassurance through these times is paramount.
In yesterday’s Let’s all Talk Mental Health session, we were joined by Esther Ususkin Cohen, Consultant Systemic/Family Psychotherapist, to talk about the impact of family difficulties on teens.
“It’s about maintaining a really careful and rather tricky balance between being open and transparent with children about what’s going on in the relationship, but also protecting them from adult information. So there has to be a careful, gentle and agreed way on how you both talk about that.”
Esther shared insight on how teens might feel or act when experiencing the breakdown or change to a family structure and gave some brilliant advice for parents and carers:
Look after yourself - Prioritise self-care and maintain a sense of normalcy. It's the classic "put your own oxygen mask on first" scenario. By looking after your own well-being, you're better equipped to support your teens.
Open communication is key - Encourage your teens to express their feelings and concerns. It's not about having all the answers but about being a listening ear. Validate their emotions and reassure them that the family's changes are not their fault.
Protect teens from conflict - Negative remarks or microaggressions can make a teen feel torn and even question their self-worth. Be aware of how you talk about your co-parent and the situation around your teen.
Remember that nobody is perfect - Expect moments of frustration and anger. If it happens, acknowledge them and apologise, not just to resolve the issue but to model healthy behaviour for your teens.
Our many audience questions included dealing with the breakdown of a family unit, co-parenting, how to approach your teen if they’re in a difficult relationship themself, and supporting teens who are living apart from their families.
If you think this week’s informative talk would be helpful for you, log in to the hub or register HERE.
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We’ll be back next Monday 29th January at 8pm with Consultant Clinical Psychologist, Dr Bettina Hohnen, to talk about Building the Foundations for Mentally Healthy Minds.
